Vital Football

Latest Colchester United News

Kelly`s Poison Prose Our Last Word On Lambert

Kelly`s Poison  Prose Our Last Word On Lambert

Colchester United F.C. ideally want to tell the whole world that nobody at the club is embittered by Paul Lambert`s departure to Norwich, but hey, most fans actually ARE.

How do I know? Because I am one.

Still, here`s the last word on it for now - we promise.

Vital Colchester has been among the most vocal U's fanzines on the internet to voice apparently outspoken opinions on Lambert`s demeaning departure this past week, reviewable via the link to an exhaustive rundown of a very hectic seven days for the side.

Lighter, tears - we've had the whole shebang!

Steve Wingnall, an ex-U`s manager, may have said he wasn`t at all surprised by what happened and looking back into history, with almost identically mutinies from Phil Parkinson and George Burley before, maybe he was wise not to be.

So, haven`t we kept Lambert and those not-so-neighbourly Norwich in the stocks for long enough, now?

Perhaps.

But yesterday I was enraged to read on the network sister sit, Vital Norwich, that a selection of City fans had the gall to describe us - not the Ipswich supporters they supposedly hate with a passion - as 'Scummers.`

And remind me, again, which club it was caught shamefully stealing a very impressionable Scotsman from Essex?

In a good old-fashioned retaliation, I then saw this: a pretty little ditty in ode to City`s less-than-chivalrous conduct, printed by Des Kelly in his weekend Daily Mail column.

After all, why should we waste time inventing more pointed purple prose than has already been published, when paid members of the real-world media will quite happily do it for us?

Besides, these cooking instructions at least seem an apt closure on the whole farce; Kelly writes:-

Here's Delia's Smith`s recipe for 'Canary Stew':

Take locally sourced ingredients.
Throw into frying pan.
Sling straight into fire.
Remove when barely done.
Stuff thoroughly.
Add garnish.
Drop straight into bin.
Order takeaway from Colchester.


Won`t somebody please pass me another tomato?



Bookmark and Share


So what do you think?

Let us know with a comment below, or chat about this article in the forum. Not yet a member? Don't panic, click on the banner below to join in.




We want to know YOUR thoughts...


VITAL COLCHESTER; YOUR VOICE, YOUR CHOICE!


VITAL COLCHESTER IS 100% UNOFFICIAL - FOR THE FANS, BY THE FANS!


Follow us on Twitter









Win FREE pizza with Vital Football!
Select your team and get 50% off if they score twice.
www.papajohns.co.uk/football



*Try Vital Mobile FOR FREE for the latest news, scores, fixtures and so much more*

Click here to join in the debate on the club forum.

Share article via email
Writer:Matt_Us
Date:Sunday August 23 2009
Time: 6:37PM

Best of Euro Vital

Best of Vital Network

Vital Boxing - Dan Blackwell Retires

Comments

0
I like it, very apt!! Good point Matt_Us made me s*******!
Rob_CU
23/08/2009 20:39:00
0
In other words laf!
Rob_CU
23/08/2009 20:40:00
0
Last word for a couple of hours at least!
theguru
23/08/2009 23:39:00
0
It was supposed to be... I can't help what Steve types up there, Guru! Vital Norwich should not have called us the scum!! Bit like hitting a wasp nest with a cricket bat right now...!
Matt_Us
23/08/2009 23:48:00
0
Sorry - just wanted to write something! lol Love the recipe! Up the U's!
StevieG Col U
24/08/2009 08:26:00
0
This is Matt's last word on Lambert - The other piece is mine!
StevieG Col U
24/08/2009 09:03:00
0
Look on the brightside, least we can get someone in that we can understand now, good riddance to sh8 i say
sonicsmegg
24/08/2009 17:55:00
0
Very true, sonicsmegg! Welcome to the site mate, up those U's!!
Matt_Us
24/08/2009 18:08:00
0
I like sonicsmegg already! lol Up the U's!
StevieG Col U
24/08/2009 21:43:00
Page 1/1
  1. 1

Login to post a comment

Recent Colchester United Articles

Match Day Officials v Barnsley (30/4/16)

The Football League have now announced the Match Day officials that will take charge of the game against Barnsley this weekend.

Colchester - Football League Dates 2016/17

The Football League, or the brainless EFL rebrand, have today released the key dates for the coming 2016/17 season.

League 1 - Colchester 0-3 Burton

We'll not be seeing any great Colchester escape this season with relegation into League 2 confirmed following a three-nil defeat against title chasing Burton.

Stats: Colchester v Burton Albion

All the stats from Colchester (0) vs (3) Burton Albion, Weston Homes Community Stadium, 23/04/16 Att: 4,292

Vital Colchester Social Media

Archived Vital Colchester Articles

Vital Colchester articles from

Have Your Say

Suggest an article
Suggest a poll
As featured on NewsNow:Colchester United newsColchester United News 24/7

Site Journalists

Write for Vital Colchester
Write For Vital Colchester
Apply Here

Current Poll (see more polls)

Barnsley v Colchester
Suggested By:
Colchester win100%
Barnsley win0%
Draw0%

League Table

# Team P W D L Pts. GD
1 Wigan 44 23 15 6 84 36
2 Burton 44 24 9 11 81 19
3 Walsall 44 22 12 10 78 15
4 Millwall 44 22 9 13 75 20
5 Bradford 44 21 11 12 74 12
6 Barnsley 44 21 7 16 70 13
7 Gillingham 44 19 12 13 69 17
8 Scunthorpe 44 19 11 14 68 10
9 Sheff Utd 44 18 12 14 66 9
10 Rochdale 44 18 11 15 65 6
11 Port Vale 44 18 11 15 65 4
12 Coventry 44 17 12 15 63 14
13 Southend 44 16 11 17 59 -4
14 Peterborough 44 17 6 21 57 4
15 Bury 44 15 12 17 57 -15
16 Swindon 44 15 10 19 55 -10
17 Oldham 44 12 18 14 54 -9
18 Chesterfield 44 14 8 22 50 -13
19 Shrewsbury 44 13 11 20 50 -17
20 Fleetwood 44 11 15 18 48 -4
21 Blackpool 44 12 10 22 46 -15
22 Doncaster 44 11 12 21 45 -14
R Colchester 44 9 12 23 39 -41
R Crewe 44 6 13 25 31 -37
Latest F1 News
Latest Vital Boxing News

Recent Colchester United Results (view all)

Colchester United Fixtures (view all)

Apr 30 2016 3:00PM : Barnsley (a)
Sky Bet League One
May 8 2016 12:30PM : Rochdale (H)
Sky Bet League One

Breaking League News